I have an extremely large and very visible scar on my left hip. It is one of many. My scars symbolize months of incomprehensible physical pain and suffering. These bodily scars are connected to an overabundance of non-visible scars that represent incomprehensible emotional pain and suffering.
These emotional scars bring back horrible memories of ambulance rides, life flights, BiPAPs, central lines, vascular filters, catheters, bed pans, chest tubes, leg traction, nerve pain, hundred plus hours of physical rehabilitation, morphine detoxification, crutches, wheelchair, walkers, shower chairs, anxiety, depression and tears.
These scars symbolize many horrific experiences, but they also symbolize many amazing and wonderful experiences. When I take a second glance at my scars, I see devoted family and friends who gave up the comforts of their homes to be by my side in the hospital for weeks on end.
I see a husband who held my hands, carried me, pushed my wheelchair, shaved my legs and helped me dress over the course of 4 months. I see hundreds of get well cards and gifts, such as food, clothes, teddy bears, and candy. I see 300 paid vacation hours donated to me by loving co-workers. I see amazing physicians that God blessed with exceptional skills. I see nurses, physical therapist, and occupational therapist with big smiles and even bigger hearts.
I also see prayer, kindness, strength, sacrifice, and especially love. I will never fully understand the reasons I had a car accident; but because of it, I fully understand that I am loved. God knew I was both physically and emotionally broken; therefore, He sent hundreds of people to profess His love for me.
“God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.”
– Hebrews 6:10 (NIV)
“Thank You, Father, for helping me through that time of pain and brokenness. I don’t quite understand suffering, but I know that You are a God of healing. Thank You for showing Yourself to me through the people around me that cared and loved me. Show me what I can do to help others….”